The Nightlife Survival Guide

The Nightlife Survival Guide:

Lewis Cole provides the collected wisdom of a drunken teen community providing a few helpful pointers to help make your night-life experience more manageable for the fresh beginners.

For many of us, we're reaching the age where self-exploration and the vices of growing up are becoming more prominent in our minds with smoking, drinking and partying becoming a large part of our social life. Well for some, starting out can lead to embarrassing mistakes like all beginners. So we decided it would be a good idea to create a basic 'survival' guide to help make a night out as enjoyable and smooth as possible, using the words of those who've learnt the hard way to make your night lives easier.

First off, after asking around college and collating a list of the general Dos and Don'ts from the old and wise among us, we have a list of the most important guidelines to follow while out clubbing to avoid potential embarrassment.

Dos:

·         For starters, clothing is important. Wear comfortable shoes that you don't mind going missing. (It may happen.) And wear thin clothing; it may be cold outside but you will boil alive in thick jackets on the dance floor.

·         Preparation is helpful. Have a meal beforehand, it allows you to soak up the gallons of booze you'll eventually down and helps to keep your stomach settled. Drinking water also helps to prepare you for the dehydration you'll experience while you're out, (not to mention it will help with the hangover the next morning.)

·         Take protection. You have no idea how your evening will go once the haze takes hold; you have no idea who you'll pull. Regardless, unexpected pregnancies can really ruin your day so be careful, and if you can't be careful, be safe.

·         Money. Naturally you can't party without money, but take cash and leave your credit card at home. This will prevent you from spending overly large amounts of money on something you will regret in the morning. Once it's gone, it's gone. And it's time to go. (But be careful to save enough money for a taxi, it's a long stumble home.)

·         Enjoy yourself. Let the drink-induced blur take hold and have fun. Meet new people and lose yourself in the beat and the lighting of the club. You never know what will happen, and that's not a bad thing.

·         Final note: Pre-drinking before you go out tends to be nicer on your wallet, drinks at the club are normally quite steep, and try to avoid getting into buying rounds for a group or you'll find your money runs out faster than you can drink.

Don'ts:

·         Don't mix drinks. If you're on the beer, stay on it, mixing shots and alike tends to end badly for your stomach, and give you a splitting headache in the morning. And, should the worst happen, mind your aim, people don't take kindly to being thrown up on and the club staff will make you clean it up. Before you've recovered.

·         Don't take your keys with you. It's a guarantee that you will lose them somewhere on your adventures and end up sleeping on your doorstep. Leave them outside your door under a plant pot for example, or organise another method of entrance beforehand.

·         Do NOT wear jeans with button flies, or equally tricky clothing. You'll never get them open, or get them closed again after your fingers are intoxicated. You'll just be the host of pictures and stories for your mates to remind you of for years to come.  

·         Be careful of who you talk to. Jealous partners don't react kindly to strangers pulling their girl, or bloke. Bar fights are a novelty but they always end badly for both parties and tend to be very effective at ruining your night out.

·         Finally, stay in control, Don't drive, for obvious reasons and ensure you can get home by any means necessary or the police will house you for the night, with a fine waiting in the morning for being 'incapable'.

       Stay safe, and have fun.

Hangovers:

Now, for all of us, regardless of how well you can manage your drink, wherever you wake up, you'll have a splitting headache and tend to see the contents of your stomach in the morning. Man has suffered this since Alcohol was first discovered by Mr Caveman all those years back. Over that time we have developed several methods to deal with this and help face the 9am start the next morning.

Drink-safe community provides loads of weird and wonderful methods for clearing your head in the morning from all over the world, but this one was voted the most effective:

·         Go out have a great time and drink yourself stupid, now to prevent a hangover the next morning follow this simple 5 point plan.

             1. Drink one large glass of water (mineral water is best)

             2. Spend 5 minutes vigorously exercising.

             3. Drink one large glass of water (again mineral water is best)

             4. Spend 5 minutes exercising.

             5. Drink one small glass of pure fruit juice (grapefruit is the best)

            And you'll wake up in the morning feeling great, apparently.

·         Breakfast, it's always a good idea to get some food in you the morning after, carbohydrate and protein are proven to help clear your insides of the impurities of the night before and make you feel a lot better. Though, above all, you should drink a lot of water, rehydration is the fastest way to quell that headache. Our elders know best.

·         Bacon Sandwich – Courtesy of the Drink aware website, it is proven by 'scientists' that the combination of salty bacon and carbohydrate clear the grogginess of the morning.

Best of luck to you. Remember, that which doesn't kill you, makes you stronger.

We hope this brief section will help you to keep your night out as confusing, enjoyable and memorable as you can manage, without the unpleasantness that many encounter. But of course, Mistakes are memories made.  

Lewis Cole.